HUMOR IS ONLY THING LEFT AFTER YESTERDAY
2 BOYS WERE PLAYING FOOTBALL IN GOLDEN GATE PARK ONE IS ATTACKED BY A ROTTWEILER.THINKING QUICKLY,THE OTHER BOY RIPS OFF A BOARD OF THE NEARBY FENCE,WEDGES IT DOWN THE DOG'S COLLAR & TWISTS,BREAKING THE DOG'S NECK.A REPORTER WHO WAS WALKING BY SEES THE INCIDENT,AND RUSHES OVER TO INTERVIEW THE BOY!
"FORTY NINERS FAN SAVES FRIEND FROM VICIOUS ANIMAL"HE STARTS WRITING IN HIS NOTEBOOK.
"BUT IM NOT A NINERS FAN"THE BOY REPLIED.
"OAKLAND RAIDERS FAN RESCUES FRIEND FROM HORRIFIC ATTACK",THE REPORTER STARTS AGAIN.
"IM NOT A RAIDERS FAN EITHER" THE BOY SAID.
THEN WHAT ARE YOU? THE REPORTER ASKED.
"IM A COWBOYS FAN"
THE REPORTER TURNS TO A NEW SHEET IN HIS NOTEBOOK AND WRITES"REDNECK BASTARD KILLS FAMILY PET"
2 BOYS WERE PLAYING FOOTBALL IN GOLDEN GATE PARK ONE IS ATTACKED BY A ROTTWEILER.THINKING QUICKLY,THE OTHER BOY RIPS OFF A BOARD OF THE NEARBY FENCE,WEDGES IT DOWN THE DOG'S COLLAR & TWISTS,BREAKING THE DOG'S NECK.A REPORTER WHO WAS WALKING BY SEES THE INCIDENT,AND RUSHES OVER TO INTERVIEW THE BOY!
"FORTY NINERS FAN SAVES FRIEND FROM VICIOUS ANIMAL"HE STARTS WRITING IN HIS NOTEBOOK.
"BUT IM NOT A NINERS FAN"THE BOY REPLIED.
"OAKLAND RAIDERS FAN RESCUES FRIEND FROM HORRIFIC ATTACK",THE REPORTER STARTS AGAIN.
"IM NOT A RAIDERS FAN EITHER" THE BOY SAID.
THEN WHAT ARE YOU? THE REPORTER ASKED.
"IM A COWBOYS FAN"
THE REPORTER TURNS TO A NEW SHEET IN HIS NOTEBOOK AND WRITES"REDNECK BASTARD KILLS FAMILY PET"
SAINTBlonde Joke
A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local
>>police cruiser pulled her over and the officer walked up to the car.
The
>>Female police officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for
the
>>blonde's driver's license.
>>
>> The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and
>>finally said to the blonde policewoman, "What does a driver's license
look
>>like?" Irritated, the blonde cop said, "You dummy, it's got your
picture
>>on it!" The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and
found a
>>small rectangular mirror down at the bottom.
>>
>> She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my
driver's
S LOSE...1-3...TIME FOR SOME HUMOR!
A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local
>>police cruiser pulled her over and the officer walked up to the car.
The
>>Female police officer also happened to be a blonde and she asked for
the
>>blonde's driver's license.
>>
>> The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and
>>finally said to the blonde policewoman, "What does a driver's license
look
>>like?" Irritated, the blonde cop said, "You dummy, it's got your
picture
>>on it!" The blonde driver frantically searched her purse again and
found a
>>small rectangular mirror down at the bottom.
>>
>> She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my
driver's
S LOSE...1-3...TIME FOR SOME HUMOR!
>> She held it up to her face and said, "Aha! This must be my
driver's
>>license" and handed it to the blonde policewoman. The blonde cop looked
in
>>the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go.
>>And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have
avoided
>>all this hassle."
driver's
>>license" and handed it to the blonde policewoman. The blonde cop looked
in
>>the mirror, handed it back to the driver and said, "You're free to go.
>>And, if I had known you were a police officer too, we could have
avoided
>>all this hassle."
1-4 NOW...WOW..HERE ANOTHER JOKE TO KEEP THIS POST AT LEAST ...FUNNY
A man escapes from a prison where he had been kept for 15 years. As he runs away, he finds a house and breaks into it, looking for money and guns, but cnly finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him up in a chair. While tying the girl up to the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her on the neck, then gets up, and goes to the bathroom. While
he's in there, the husband tells his wife, "Listen, this guy is an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail, and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, just do what he tells you, just give him satisfaction. This guy must be dangerous, if he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you." To which the wife responds, "He was not kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we kept any Vaseline in the bathroom. Be strong, honey, I love you, too."
A man escapes from a prison where he had been kept for 15 years. As he runs away, he finds a house and breaks into it, looking for money and guns, but cnly finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him up in a chair. While tying the girl up to the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her on the neck, then gets up, and goes to the bathroom. While
he's in there, the husband tells his wife, "Listen, this guy is an escaped prisoner, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail, and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, just do what he tells you, just give him satisfaction. This guy must be dangerous, if he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you." To which the wife responds, "He was not kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we kept any Vaseline in the bathroom. Be strong, honey, I love you, too."
